Yo. Just got back from England (actually I've been back 2 weeks now just need a good, cliche start) where my lips were all cracked and red and black and dry and horribly painful. Back in sunny, humid Singapore, things are back to normal, just the way i'm used to: normal, moisturised epidermis, comfortable, unpredictable temperature, nua T-shirt and bermudas, carefree Singlish, sudden appearance of eczema...
Man I almost got that trolley through the barrier at platform nine and three-quarters. But they must have realised that I'm a Muggle and left me stuck halfway. Ok not funny.
England is all quaint and nice really, but I'm really not used to it. Culture shock, scare, whatever. For one, the sudden blasts of cold air (and dry) are, I suppose pleasant in their own way but I kinda prefer the Singapore system of air-con in warm weather instead of heater in the freaking cold. I feel like ham being taken from the freezer and being left to defrost indoors. Only hams get defrosted outdoors. You know. Outside. The fridge doors.
Ok never mind.
Also the sudden need to convert from Singlish to English is truly not easy. Suddenly the Han Yu Pin Yin of the language goes all funny and expressive and you've got to mind your lahs and lors. Everything is "Brilliant!" and "Fantastic!" and "Amazing!", when in Singapore all we've got is "Ok lah. Not bad. Liddat lor". Don't stare at me when I'm back in Singapore asking my wy tiu the chube stytion. But still. Should get cracking on speaking proper English sentences without the humps and bumps of Singlish here and there. I also have to get used to using the right words there. Like fries are no longer fries but chips. Elevator is lift. Oh right. In Singapore we call lifts lifts too. Singlish is so annoying. So is English. Why can't there be a uniform term for potato strips and automated, box-like staircase substitutes? Why must UK and US call them differently? Why must Singapore adopt a half UK had US social dictionary? Perhaps one day some important people shoudl sit down together and iron out these words. Like calling a lift and eleliftor. On one hand it's a cross between an elevator and a lift. On the other hand it is a cross between elephant, lift and the tor in elevator, showing that the device so strong and sturdy that it is an elephant liftor, thus, the eleliftor. Cheers to my brainwave.
Anyway, the point being, I found it hard to transit from Singlish to English.
Thirdly, the cost. Everything except digestive biscuits cost about three time as much as they do in Singapore (except in Orchard Road. And Sentosa. And other tourist hotspots used for cheating money from foreigners for the benefit of our economy). A pie in London costs slightly more than 3 pounds, which is easily $10 in Singapore. Not a big pie too. That's about 10 times the price of a slightly smaller pie from Giant. But then again, that's London so that's none of my business. I will be in a cost-saving little town which is in truth a city but looks like a town where pies cost just 3 times more than they do in Giant. Whoopee. Still, there is the bright side. Digestive biscuits only cost about 70 cents...
But really, the place is all nice and quaint with chimneys (they really smoke!) and weeds which are much nicer than the flowers in Singapore, which include bougeanvilla (not sure how to spell it), lalang, frangipani, ixora and mimosa, to name the colourful ones. Not bad. That's pink, porridge-grey, red, white and pink. Oh. I've already mentioned pink. No offence to the Garden City... I'm sure we have lots of greenery though, along the roads and in, uh, the Botanic Gardens.
Singapore should be the Glutton City. Oh. But surprise surprise, we're already the Food Paradise -___- . Typical. But really, no matter how great (as in large) the food in England is, Singapore will always be in my stomach. Yea the food there is really huge and everything, but nothing impressive and affordable, really. We have big fish in Fish and Co, big stingray in chomchomp and big burgers in Carl's Jr. :D
Oh and it gets really freaky when this perfectly ordinary-looking guy leaning on the pillar next to you at the bus station suddenly turns to the entire bus station and shouts, " Do you know where your destination is?" and you think, " Oh well, yea. The airport. But I'd better check my ticket again."
And just when you are unfolding your ticket, you freeze as the guy shouts, " Will it be Heaven? Or Hell?"
And you don't dare to move or look at them in case they start asking you whether you want to go to Heaven or Hell when all you want really is to go to the airport.
It also isn't very pleasant to know that the guy (who has been joined by a partner) is standing next to the pillar next to you (which is now behind you as you have surreptiously inched your way toward other people with luggages who are politely pretending not to notice anything).
I'm not against the religion or anything. I have many friends of a healthy variety of religions. But it gets really freaky when someone you thought was perfectly ordinary (and within grabbing distance) starts preaching so vehemently.
Ok. Preferably you're reading this just before sleeping as it is not a short entry to read. May be abit tiring to comprehend at certain parts too. In fact, I am going to sleep soon myself. I shall post a picture of the big fish and chips I had there in the next entry. Goodnight!
